Channeling Anger Into Performance
1. Anger can be normal and healthy emotion that helps us instinctively detect and respond to a threatening situation.
2. When it is properly channeled, it can be a powerful motivating force.
3. However, it can also be an emotion that gets out of control, leading to stress, distress, unhealthiness and unhappiness.
4. Uncontrolled anger can seriously harm your personal and professional life, because it
can become incredibly destructive – to yourself and the people around you.
5. In a modern workplace that often demands trust and collaboration, it can cause great damage to working relationships.
Danger Of Anger – Foolishness…
1. A negative response can damage relationships and lead to a loss of respect and self respect. This is particularly the case when we react instantly and angrily to what we perceive to be a threat, but where that perception is wrong. This can leave us looking very foolish.
2. Therefore, we need to learn to use anger positively, and manage it so that it is constructive and not destructive.
3. Where situations are not immediately life-threatening, we need to calm down and evaluate the accuracy of our perceptions before, if necessary, channeling anger in a powerful but controlled way.
Using The Tool
So when you’re angry, use Redford Williams’ 12 Steps to calm down;
Step 1: Maintain a “Hostility Log”
When you know what makes you angry, you will be in a much better position to develop strategies to contain it or channel it effectively.
Step 2: If you do, acknowledge that you have a problem managing anger.
It is an observed truth that you cannot change what you don’t acknowledge. So it is important to identify and accept that anger is a roadblock to your success.
Step 3: Use your support network
If anger is a problem, let the important people in your life know about the changes your are trying to make. They can be a source of motivation and their support will help your lapse into old behavior patterns.
Step 4: Use anger management techniques to interrupt the anger cycle
i) Pause
ii) Take a deep breaths
iii) Tell your self you can handle this situation
iv) Stop the negative thoughts
Step 5: Use empathy
f another person is the source of your anger, try to see the situation form his or her perspective. Remind yourself to be objective and realize that everyone makes mistakes and it is through mistakes that people learn how to improve.
Step 6: Laugh at yourself
Humor is often the best medicine. Learn to laugh at yourself and not take everything so seriously.
Step 7: Relax
Angry people are often the ones who let the little things bother them. If you learn to calm down you will realize that there no need to get uptight and you will have fewer angry episodes.
Step 8: Build Trust
Angry people can be cynical people. They believe that others are going to do something on purpose to annoy or frustrate them even before it happens. If you can build trust in people you will be less likely to become angry with them when something does go wrong and more likely to attribute the problem to something other than malicious intent.
Step 9: Listen
Miscommunication contributes to frustrating and mistrusting situations. The better you listen to what a person is saying, the better able you will be to find a resolution that does not involve an anger response.
Step 10: Be assertive
Remember, the work is assertive NOT aggressive. When you angry it is often difficult to express yourself properly. You are too caught up in the negative emotion and your physiological symptoms (beating heart, red face) to put together solid argument or appropriate responses. If your learn to assert yourself and let other people know your expectations, boundaries, issues, and so on, you will have much more interpersonal success.
Step 11: Live each day as if it is your last
This saying may be overused, but it holds a fundamental truth. Life is short and it is much better spent positively than negatively. Realize that if you spend all your time getting angry, you will miss out on the many joys and surprises that life has to offer.
Step 12: Forgive
To ensure that the changes you are making go much deeper than the surface, you need to forgive the people in your life that have angered you. It is not easy letting go of pass hurts and resentments but the only way to move past your anger is to let go of these feelings and start fresh.
These 12 steps form a comprehensive plan to get control of inappropriate and unproductive anger. And the quicker you begin the better.